answer.

So, not only am I indecisive but I'm a little bit impatient. Well, not entirely true in all instances or circumstances but when it deals with matters of the heart and the Lord - I am a microwaveable answer wanting fool. I've been up since 4 AM on my day off. [Yep that's right - madness I say madness!] I got a definite 1 of 2 answers on what I should do. Progress! The first I have no doubt that I need to suck it up and obey. It will be the most challenging thing that will be the death of me this school year. There is such an easier, greener road I can take on that one but sigh....you know how that story goes...must be obedient. The second answer I have is like, "Really?! Are you sure? Really?!" type of answer. It makes no sense. It's a leap of faith. "What is faith? It is the confident assurance that what we hope for is going to happen. It is the evidence of things we cannot yet see." [Hebrews 11:1] I really don't know what is to come or if I am making the right decision. The Lord has been placing verses here and there to encourage me that all will be okay. "Patient endurance is what you need now, so you will continue to do God's will. Then you will receive all that he has promised." [Hebrews 10:36] It will disappoint the old but will be embraced by the new. Lord willing, I will take this step of faith. "...as a result, we learned not to rely on ourselves, but on God..." [2 Corinthians 1:8]

I gotta laugh at the thought of my current situation. Three years ago, making these decisions would not even exist as I would not hesitate in doing whatever that was best for me. It makes me smile at the many miles I have gone in my walk. As Romans 6:20 explains it: In those days, I was a slave to sin and wasn't concerned with doing what was right in His eyes. I was ashamed of the things I used to do but now, I am a slave of God and do things to please Him. I have many many more miles to go but I'm steadily trying to walk forward. For "it isn't enough just to have faith. Faith that doesn't show itself by good deeds is no faith at all - it is dead and useless." [James 2:17] Pawn to the King. Lead me back if I made the wrong choice. My eyes are on You. Checkmate.